Pain in the ass bike!

I`m not sure which was louder, my artificial heart valve ticking or my bike rattling along as I was pedaling along. One thing is for sure though, after 18 very long miles on a bike, I felt pain in places I don`t want to mention (which I know is difficult to understand given the fact that the word “ass” is in this post`s title!) and I felt that there`s no way in heckaroo that I will be able to complete my self inflicted challenge.

The good news however, is that I haven`t received my new bike yet. The bad ass bike that took me for a journey through no-sensation-but-pain-in-my-butt county and up I-could-have-sworn-somebody-stuck-rusty-knives-in-my-knees hill before I eventually crossed the finish line in the valley of I-will-never-ever-be-able-to-ride-even-close-to-200-miles-before-September, was my $5 garage sale bike. The experience was so rough though that I have my doubts, serious doubts that I will reach my goal.

If you are new to this blog, know that my goal is to complete on a bicycle 200 miles in one day on or before the one-year anniversary of my open heart surgery which happened September 18, 2009. I`m in horribly bad shape, I don`t have a decent bike yet (it has been ordered and is due to be delivered within a few days). But, no need to worry, I still have more that 6 months to prepare. Good grief, only 6 months!

6 months until my anniversary. This means that I have wasted 6 months already with very little training, almost no weight loss and absolutely no training on a bike. Why am I doing this again?

The garage sale bike has been in my possession for a few years. It`s old, it`s too small and it`s in good old fashioned bad shape. Worn down to say the least. I decided a few days ago that until I get my Cervelo I`ll take the old bike out a few times. First little trip was to be 24 miles, actually the same route that I plan to be the first 24 miles of my 200-mile day. The first 8.5 miles are relatively flat. They seem very flat if you drive in a car, but there`s actually a steady almost not noticeable climb all the way. After 8.5 miles, there`s a moderate climb for a mile or so, then downhill for a quarter mile before it flattens out up til the 12 mile marker. There I make a u-turn and go back.

I never made it to the 12 mile marker. I didn`t even make it to the top of the moderate climb. After 8.5 miles I was empty. I made it on pure will power 1/4 up the climb. My legs were hurting real bad, my knees locked, and my heart rate monitor told me my heart was beating at 169 beats per minute. At my age that`s pretty close to what should be my maximum heart rate. (Rule of thumb says 220 minus your age. I`m 44 years old.) The u-turn I made a few miles too early marked the death of my self confidence. Here I was feeling all great about my newborn heart and everything. So much for that!

I made it home, barely. It took me 86 minutes to complete 18 miles. I`m not even gonna think about what average speed that equals. It`s time to reassess my goal and hope, really hope that the new bike will be so much better that I will regain some of my confidence. It should be here soon. I`m not someone who gives up though. My will power is strong and I refuse to….well, see the writing on the wall perhaps? I guess the months to come will prove something. What exactly remains to be seen. And you, will read about it here.

Don`t change the channel.

THE Bionic Cyclist.

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